Three Russian jokes.

Tonight I received from my friend an email with Russian jokes.

Below are three of them.

– Doctor, I broke a leg in two places!!!
– Do you remember those places?
– Yes,of course!!!
– Don`t go there anymore!

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– Doctor, every morning at seven o’clock I take a piss.

– Well, what is wrong about that?
–  I do not wake up until eight o`clock!

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– Doctor, my husband thinks he is a racehorse.
– I can treat him, but it will cost a lot of money.
– We have the money. He has already won two races.

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131girls

 

Alcohol, marriage, sport

I accept no responsibility for thoughts below!

A person who sent them to me is not their author and told his wife that he disagrees with them.

I am sorry if my translation from Russian made them incomprehensible or unacceptable to you.

Please skip them for purity of your mind and convictions.

 Alcohol does not help to answer questions. !t allows to forget them.

Marriage is like a soup. First two spoonfuls are very hot, last two are very cold. Moral: eat it fast and run for the second dish.

Chess is the most dangerous sport! You can fall asleep and hit your eye with a Queen!

12220142

 

Several Russian jokes

The jokes below are from my friend from Toronto (I got an email from him several minutes ago).

They came in Russian, Google translated them and then I edited them.

If you like them please let me know which one is your favorite.

If you don’t like them please let me know and I will tell my friend about it.

Here are the jokes:

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1. “Doctor, every night I have the same dream. I come to a door with a sign on it. I push it but it does not open”.

“And what written on the sign?”

“Pull.”

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2. “Doctor, when I will be discharged?”

“After your cardiogram straightens.”

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3. Tonight thermometer knocked on the window and asked to let him into the house.

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 4. Time is not a therapist. Time is anesthesiologist.
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